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Trauma partner love and sex

June 13, 2017

Having a partner with a sex obsession or love addiction can be deeply upsetting and all consuming. First and foremost, we understand the feelings you are having right now and you are not alone in them. Sexual and emotional betrayal manifests itself in many ways and common feelings can include shock, humiliation, deception, manipulation and betrayal. Most hurtful of all is that these feelings are caused by someone you love. It is important for you to remember that you are not to blame for this situation. You did not cause it and the blame does not lie with you.

One of the most important things is that you learn to care for yourself as this crisis is a draining one – both physically and emotionally. Our aim is to help you find your sense of self-validation and recognise that others have found themselves in a similar predicament but through our help and support have turned their lives around, thriving and becoming a more confident and reassured person. We will help you to make empowered choices and take ownership of your own needs and sexuality. You will find strength within yourself that you never knew existed. We have been able to help many others with these types of issues and can provide that support to you. If you are experiencing any of the following symptoms, please call us for support and guidance in how to move forward.

Symptoms of betrayal trauma

Emotional reactivity – You may experience excessive emotional reactions and frequent mood swings.

Hyper-vigilance – This can take the form of ‘detective work’ style behaviour. Checking phones, wallets, bank statements or browser history.

Predicting future betrayal – In this state, you may find yourself piecing together innocuous behaviour and events in order to predict times where you may be hurt again.

Being highly reactive – You may notice your spouse staring at another attractive person or coming home late and feel anger, fear or anxiety because of this.

Sleeplessness – You may have nightmares or difficulty focusing on things during the day.

Obsessing – This involves letting the events of the trauma consume you, leaving you unable to focus or making you depressed.

Avoidance – Refusal to think or talk about the trauma, common in people who have had a traumatic experience.

Compulsive behaviours – You may attempt to soothe your anxiety by shopping, eating or exercising more regularly than you usually would.

For information on this type of trauma and related symptoms, please visit our How We Treat page.

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